If Dock

sheeps · If Dock

offers you a hoss tip.

Back summat else (summat else is not a hoss).

Two fucking quid he cost me!

Tank Girl

you would be far better off follwing foo's football betting tips.

Sir Bulldog Craggwood

he is but a patsy for corrupt bookmakers and a mysterious Singaporean race-fixing syndicate

(whats the damage and which canofPedigreeChuminthemaking did he tip?)

bearing

You dissing my mate sheeps?

Dock

Lets get things nice and fucking crystal like shall we.

*sets scene*

On Saturday afternoon, I was, as is my want of a Saturday afternoon in the flat racing season, purusing the runners and riders of the days racing in my newspaper. I glanced at Ripon and thought "Sheepster is there today, hope he's having a good day and the weather's as nice as it is in Leeds". I was looking through the races, nothing really jumped out at me, and then I looked at the 4.35. I then sent Sheeps/Judas-fucking-bastard a text, because I know he's not that into horse racing and might like a bit of advice. The text said:

'If I was to have a bet, I'd go with Glenns Princess in the 4.35. The trainer Richard Fahey is brilliant at training short distance sprinters, and he's got his top jock on it. That is all.'

The trainer is the thid most successful flat trainer so far this season, and the horse was running over five furlongs, which is, along with seven furlongs, the distance he specialises in training horses for.

The horse was third, so if he'd have had an each way bet (Sheeps-Judas-fucking-bastard that is, not Fahey), he'd have won some money. I never said it was a dead cert because there isnt, and has never been any such thing as a dead cert in horse racing.

To conclude, I thought I'd offer help and advice to a friend, and it's ended in me being derided as some sort of spiv/shit tipster amongst my peers.
Just you fucking wait my lad, and if you think that promised Bonio gift-set is going to be entering your personal orbit anytime soon, your very much mistaken. And I'm sanctioning an immediate embargo on all squeeky toys. Fuckin' show you yer little bastard.

sheeps

Anyway,

It was two quid to me but I was so confident of the shit/spiv tipsters expertise that I shared my good fortune

with my fellow race goers.

Twenty eight quid on the neb.

Hope he doesn't sleep fer a week.

Dock

Pond Life

http://www.claimsdirect.co.uk/sta...m%22&utm_campaign=New_-_Claim

Dock

bearing

Your money is your own sheeps, what you do with it is your problem and not Docks.

Now behave yourself.

Tell him bollocks Dock, but don't tell him to F off, cause he'll go above me in the table 'n that...

Dock

Bollocks to you Sheeps!

bearing

sheeps

You two are gayers with each other I reckon.

Obvious.

bearing